Material Monster

Our reality is stuffed with burdens. It seems that the more we grow technology and ways to make things more speedily, the more panic anxiety attacks increase. That is food for thought. You would think that bothersome demands and anxieties would diminish with our consistent advancement in technology. Yet, anxiety and depression seem more commonplace now than they ever were in the past. It is quite possible that in the past, such conversation topics were avoided. Well they surely make an issue of it these days. Fact is, if you’ve ever spent an afternoon in front of the TV, I’m sure you’ve witnessed some sort of ad for a medicinal drug, which provides panic attacks treatment (anxiety–attacks.org).

These issues are rising to the surface and being discussed openly. Whether it be sleep related or dread of public places, scientists are always coming up with different ways to fix it. Anxiety and depression are certainly at the top of this long list. When I consider depression, I think of an individual who has recently lost a loved one or someone who is afflicted in such a way that precludes them from carrying on normally. This is not necessarily accurate. Numerous people are stressed out by the burden of anxiety and natural depression for other reasons. Some of which are not even known. The food we consume could easily be a reason. For some reason or another, folk seem to have troubles with remaining content.

We need to some degree to pay attention to teenagers’ plight. Panic attacks and depressive disorder seems to be striking them more than anyone these days. Granted, being a teenager is challenging in some aspects, and unbelievably delightful in others. While some teens may contend that it’s horrible. We all were teens at least once. We certainly know much of what they are going through. Nevertheless, I can never recall being depressed. It is challenging to understand the changes of the last ten years. Panic attacks should not be a part of childhood. As a matter of fact, anxiety attacks and depression should be much less frequent than it is altogether.

The last time I fought depression it lasted for over three years. I had lost my ability to respond to anything good, in fact good things just hurt me more because they reminded me of what I once was able to enjoy. I had no incentive to even get out of a chair on my free time, and work was an excruciating ordeal I had to go through every day in order to earn the privilege of going back to sleep. Everything irritated me. None of the accomplishments of mankind seemed to impress me or feed me. I couldn’t even tolerate the banality of a magazine or any reading material because it seemed to trigger a painful exasperation. All I could think about was the person I used to be.

I knew that I was capable of being vitally interested in things, I had often connected with the rapt intimacy of a Muse, I had thrilled to every little detail going on around me, I had been able to buoy myself up when I experienced something ugly or discouraging. I had resilience. I trusted things, including my own judgement. I laughed a lot. I delighted in playing with words in my head, looked forward to each coming day, and most important, I felt cozy inside of myself.

When we are cozy inside of ourselves it is like we have come home. Everything fits. If there is no one else around at the time it doesn’t matter because we are so enthralled with the company of our own person. Nothing pinches us emotionally and nothing haunts us. We are completely satisfied with who we perceive ourselves to be. We feel creative and inspired, and no one can take that cozy feeling away from us. Every one of you reading this article must have felt that way at least at one point in your life.

Grab the memory and all the sensations of that time. Relive it in your mind, no matter how much it hurts that you cannot seem to recover that mental state. It will then become reinforced and will energize the parts of you which are ailing. You are reassured that yes, this condition is possible for you, so there is no reason why you could not find it again.

How do you find it again? For me, prozac was and is quite helpful. It balances your chemistry and so gives you a buffer between yourself and the raw hurts of this world. Secondly, I took a new plan of action even though I doubted my decision every step of the way. I needed to alter the physical surroundingsof my environment. Yes, those two treatments worked. But I discovered something really valuable along the way.

Many of the sensory impressions I had reacted to as being pathetic and hopeless turned out to be the the same ones that I was experiencing right now. This time, however, I delighted in them. I still am amazed when I see or hear something that would have disgusted me back in those days and I notice that this time it is acceptable and even enchanting at times. So don’t believe those hurtful impressions. I was shown that the way we perceive things is totally subjective, depending on where our own body chemistry and outlook are at the time.

Don’t let go of your model. Conjure it up every chance you get because that is the light which will guide you out of your hole. Remember that what seems unbearably negative could be tweaked into something nice if you just access the state that makes the change possible. Cheer yourself with the promise that unless you are brain damaged, you really will come back and you will feel wonderful once again. If you felt it before, then it is within your composition to feel it again.

Olga Moe, age 59, lives on an island in the Puget Sound. She is recognized primarily for her contributions to literary e-zines but has recently begun writing articles as well. http://zelda2530.tripod.com